Sunday, August 26, 2012

An a-peeling relationship

Dear OXO peeler,

I have adored you since I first met you. you were so ... a-peeling ... in the store, so I brought you home with me. I have been faithful.



But you .... You like to play games. When I need you, you disappear.


Are you cavorting with the scoops?


Are you spooning with the spatulas?


Why do you hide from me when I need you most? Where are you? WHERE???

I am tired of these games. I am giving you one last chance. 
A warning. 
A competitor.

Yes, you now have a twin.

Or to be exact, a clone.


Even identical twins are not exactly the same. 
Your new clone is a little taller, more robust. 
Some might even say more handsome.

If you refuse to behave; if you continue to be coy and hide and pretend you don't care about me as much as I care about you, I will have no choice but to cast you aside for your newer clone. You will have to live with the spoons and spatulas and take cold comfort in the fact that I might agree to bring you out into daylight when your replacement is is the dishwasher. What do you say to that?

Traitor.

*sniff* but I still love you...

A few notes to my faithful readers:
  1. No, I have not gone completely mad.
  2. This is an entry into an OXO-sponsored contest.
  3. I really do love my OXO peeler, though.
  4. It's possible the dish did run away with the spoon. I have no inside information on that situation, however.
  5. I later realized that the contest required entry on Facebook, but this amused me enough to publish here.
  6. Because I'm weird like that.
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